Everything
by DomiHearts1497
Summary: "You say I have nothing," I begin to say, my voice coming out hoarse and choked as I face her. "But I had everything." Written for the September 2013 Prompt for the Caesar's Palace One Shot Challenge. Rated T for language, dark thoughts, and disturbing imagery.


**One Shot Challenge: Everything**

**Holes by Passenger**_  
When you've got nothing, you've got nothing to lose..._

**Disclaimer: Don't own the 'Ring around the Rosy' Rhyme, Bring Me to Life by Evanescence, nor lyrics to Haunt (Demo) by Bastille**

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Oakland Sorroiten (18) District 7 Female Victor of the 91st Games

"When you have nothing, you have nothing to lose," President Seraphina Echo sneers as she circles around me as I sit in a luxurious chair in the middle of her dining room. Despite the warmth, I feel the ever lingering chill in the room as the young President and I sit together, dining with the devil herself.

Sitting at the cherry oak table with only a small candle illuminating my face, all I could think about is the raw and empty feeling that stirs and deepens in my scarred and broken body. The pit of my stomach filled with only shame and terror as the images of my Games replay over and over in my head. Over and over like clockwork as she slithers around me like a cobra, ready to squeeze the small amount of life left inside of me.

"Oakland, you are very beautiful. Very desirable," she coos as she traces her index finger across my cheek to tuck a strand of my straight black hair behind my ears. "Many men would want you." The venom in her voice stings and slashes at my oozing heart which drips with misery and pain that digs deep, deeper than any dagger could.

A Capitol whore. One of many fears since winning. I would never be loved for who I was, only what I had done. I would only be fucked by countless men and women for the sake of saying that they slept with a Victor. A child killer… I would never, even if I tried… regain my happiness. Because that service for fame and fortune is the most traumatizing, no matter how strong you are…

"You say I have nothing," I begin to say, my voice coming out hoarse and choked as I face her. I let my lifeless hazel eyes glaze over her light green ones. To show her what blank and dark expression now resides in my once lively and joyous orbs. "But I had everything."

I let my voice waver with the pain I must endure 'till my grave. Letting her know through the words that no longer shrill and crescendo, but sound with dissonance and decay. Forever lost in the spiral of oblivion.

"I had a life back in 7 with my family and friends. My life may not have been perfect, but it was still beautiful. The many experiences and emotions flitting through me as my body grew and matured," I say with each word increasing in impatience as the growing edge of speaking tore through me. "I loved, I learned, and I lived. And you took that from me…"

Seraphina laughs, the shrillness of it sending shameless tears stinging at the corners of my eyes. "You call that life! Please," she exasperates as she faces me. "Life is having fortune and fame! Riches beyond your wildest dreams. Fame stretching millenniums!"

The bile rises in my throat as I face the woman who has stolen my innocence. "The fame and fortune that matters to me is my family and home. District 7," I cry out as I shake uncontrollably in my chair, letting the numbing pain of nothing wash over me.

"I've given you _everything_," she screams as her black stilettos shriek against the marble flooring. "You are very ungrateful, shame really… about your family."

Time begins to slow as I grab the small pendant with the yellowed and withered picture snugged deep in its grasp as three sets of eyes stare back at me: my family.

"I've received news that your family died in that deadly forest fire in 7 yesterday night," she sighs as the chair beside me skids and relaxes as she takes her place in it. "Tragic, isn't it? That was the reason for this little meeting and of course… to congratulate you on your victory…"

"Wh-What?" A part of me doesn't believe the cruelness and evil hidden deep beneath the casting shadow of the Capitol and their dangerous Games… and yet the other part envisions nothing, just pitch black with bursts of white light that puncture and flash ever so often.

"They are dead."

The words send me into a frenzy, my heart jack hammering against my Capitol enhanced chest as I fall to the floor. Screaming and thrashing on the marble, all I could think about was my younger sister's beautiful blue eyes that shone with such beauty and innocence, now lifeless and cold. My mother's tanned skin, now pale and streaked with the crimson liquid I had come to known. My father's smile, now stretched and crooked, grinning like the many ghosts that had visited me since the arid and cold nights in the Arena.

"NOOOOO!"

The bloodcurdling scream escapes my lips as Seraphina holds me down, whipping out a vial filled with a clear oily liquid and at the end, a large needle in which she sticks into my thigh. A warmth flushes through me and my body relaxes. Black dots begin to circle my line of vision as she hovers above me, her curly red hair brushing up against my cheeks.

"Sweet dreams… Oakland."

* * *

_Ring around the rosy_

_A pocket full of posy_

_Ashes_

_Ashes_

_We all fall down…_

I open my eyes to grey walls surrounding me on all sides as the shapes and colors sharpen and reveal that I am still here. Trapped like an animal imprisoned in my own mind…

"And we all fall down…"

The Capitol Asylum. More like a prison if you ask me, really anyone who is attending. The pallid walls etched with tick marks with the dreadful and hellish days spent here. The air reeks of piss and blood, even the smell of death that lingers even in the building long after they freshen up the place . The floor beneath my sickly body even coats with the very ash of those who do not obey, who are burned alive and whose screams ricochet against the walls of my skull.

"Ashes… Ashes…"

I drag my index finger across the rough ground and let it collect the grainy and dry substance. I release it with one weak puff of breath and watch as it explodes and spreads like the wildfire that killed my family. The dead flying around me in small particles and threaten to travel down my throat and take me with them. Choke the microscopic life I have left…

Nothing.

This was my 'talent'. You know, the one every Victor was supposed to have. I learned every crease and crevice to my bedroom walls, the shiny and materialistic items that sat in that house. The house for killers like me. I sat and stared, never letting my mind wander to other things other than screams and blood, and children like me… my mind had deteriorated into an altered state, I no longer felt physical pain. Even as the blades kissed my ghostly pale skin from which blossomed beads of blood that dripped and splattered my bed sheets. Nothing was all I possessed, all I had left…

Lying on my back, I begin to think of the old song my mother would sing to me. Her voice would ring and fill the room with her hushed and beautiful voice, seeping with rebellious and dangerous words that would get us all hanged if she dared to speak them outside our home.

I sing her song to them, the song that keeps the sea of the undead at bay. The requiem for those who had died here when I was admitted and those twenty- three children who died for me to escape the horrors of the Games.

_I'll come back to haunt you_

_Memories will taunt you_

_And I will try to love you_

_It's not like I'm above you…_

As I repeat the song, repeating her long lost words I find myself standing in front of the mirrors that surround me on all sides of me, the ones the stylists used on me. I twirl and watch as a pale figure follows me, her long black hair matted with dried blood and covers her round face, a soft blue hue kissing her skin as my eyes travel to her empty sockets. Dark and lifeless as her eyes seem to reflect a sorrow and distant look, it sending a rippling of sadness for the deranged looking girl despite her appearance. Suddenly however, as to torment me further, she changes…

Her eyes begin to form and develop, her irises gleaming between a honey hazel and a blood red, a glint of evil and revenge. My blood runs cold as she charges toward me, her figure getting closer and closer to me on all sides of the mirrors as I desperately snap my head side to side to side…

"Come with us Oakland… join us…" she rasps as she holds out a hand to me, shriveled and decomposed. The skin an ashen grey, falling apart at the bone.

"No…"

My panting begins to increase as she charges at me, a white flash blinding me ever so often, forming a silhouette around the girl as she brings above her head a dagger. The very dagger I killed four people with. It slices the air, sending the air around me frigid and I scream as she brings it down into my chest.

"NOOOO!" The scream shatters the mirror into millions of pieces and she disappears, wisps of light that circle and envelope me in darkness. The ominous of it all holding its grasp around me as I feel the pressure building in my head about to explode.

My eyes snap open to just the walls again, the walls that will enclose me even in death as I rot here. Never to see the light again, or feel the subtle warmth of the brilliant sun. To grasp onto the leaves of autumn or the petals of spring would just be a distant and sad memory. To see my family's faces would be miraculous, yet depressing as I would realize it would be just some terrible and sick joke. To fall in love and have children of my own, just a dream, unfulfilled and lost…

I could never experience these special and every day things that made my life everything I had hoped for it to be. Now I will just wish and wallow in pain here as the walls close me in from the life I once had, the one that shone brighter than any Capitol coin ever could.

So please listen to me when I tell you that we Victors want nothing more than to feel something, something better than the nothing that stirs within our broken hearts. For the life of us; for the life we once had. We just want someone to…

_Save us from the nothing we've become…_

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**Thanks to subliminal shady (Shady) and Sgarnett99 for looking this over for me :)**

**Love Always, Domi**


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